August #AskGretchen: Politics, Bratty Kids, Single Again, Conflict at Work

Pop’s Blog would like to welcome Gretchen Hydo, an executive business and life coach. Once a month Gretchen will offer her advice on parenting, business, relationships, love, money, friendships and more right here on Pop’s Blog. Feel free to send in your questions to be included in her next #AskGretchen column or you can e-mail her at [email protected]  or use this link to go directly to the form: http://anylengthslifecoaching.com/askgretchen-form/. This is a free and anonymous service.

Dear Gretchen: My boss is driving me crazy with his political opinions and it is starting to make things uncomfortable at work. He wants to know my thoughts on every political topic and gets really intense when talking about the news. He and I see things very differently. How do I put a stop to these unwanted conversations while keeping things copasetic on the work front? – Trumped, New Orleans, LA

 Dear Trumped: During a political year with hot topics and tragic world-events, this can be especially difficult. With varying opinions, and intense emotions, it is best to steer clear of all political conversations while on the clock. Political issues are a private affair. Knowing the political view of someone else can create a bias and make for uncomfortable interactions. The next time your boss broaches the subject, let him know that you would rather not discuss your political views at work. If your boss continues with his rant, listen to what he has to say but avoid making comments of your own. It takes two people to have a political discussion. You can always change the subject by bringing up something related that’s less controversial and move the conversation away from politics all together. – Gretchen

Dear Gretchen: My friend’s daughter is a real stinker. She back talks constantly, and her mother never makes her listen. The child whines and cries and throws tantrums when she doesn’t get her way. It is obnoxious. My friend always gives in. Is there anything I should say to my friend about this? Manners Matter, Orlando, FL

Dear Manners: It’s easy to judge a situation when you aren’t the parent and the one who is giving 24/7 care. If your friend hasn’t asked, it isn’t any of your business. Your well-intentioned comments could be met with defensiveness. When you are with your friend and one of these situations occurs, you can ask her if there is anything you can do to help or excuse yourself so that you aren’t involved. Giving unwelcome advice can be hurtful and damage a friendship. Parents struggle to figure out the “right way” to parent their children and can feel the unspoken judgment and criticism of others. A kind thing to do would be to ask your friend if you can give her a break so that she can go and do something nice for herself while you watch her daughter. Rest assured, your friend is as uncomfortable as you are with the public scenes and is doing her very best. – Gretchen

Dear Gretchen: What is the best way to resolve conflict in the workplace? – Adrienne S. Sherman Oaks, CA

Dear Adrienne: Schedule to have a conversation with the person that you are having a conflict with and let them know that you would like to clear the air. Be sure to prepare for the conversation by defining the real issue at hand and setting an objective. What is it that you want to accomplish? Be specific so that you do not get derailed during the meeting. During the conversation, take responsibility for your part and be sure to preserve the relationship by hearing the other person out. Even if you do not agree with them, it is important to honor their thoughts and feelings. Before ending the meeting, create joint action items that will help move you and the other party closer to your intended goal. Set a follow-up meeting to go over the results. Often, people are willing to get on your side if they know that you are committed to seeing things through and to share in the responsibility. – Gretchen

Dear Gretchen: How do I ease back into the dating world after years off? – Single Again in Burbank, CA

Dear Single: Entering the dating world can be scary. If you haven’t dated in a while, the pressure to find the right person and to make up for lost time can be overwhelming. Knowing what you want before jumping back in is important and will help you to attract the right kind of dating partner. For instance, do you want someone who only intends to date with no real endgame in mind? Do you want to get married? Are you just looking for someone to have dinner with? Whatever your answer is, honor it. The clearer you are about what you want, the easier it will be to spot it when it comes your way. To find the kind of people who might be a good fit, go out to places that you enjoy and have a good time. Your natural sparkle will come out if you are truly enjoying yourself and will help you to attract the right kind of partner. Ask your friends to set you up with people who they think you will connect with and remember to keep an open mind. Take the pressure off of the date by remembering it is just another experience and may or may not lead to a marriage proposal. The most important thing to remember is to be true to yourself. Don’t ignore the red flags or your intuition. And don’t let fear keep you small. Have fun! – Gretchen

 Gretchen Hydo is an executive business & life coach who helps her clients gain fresh perspectives on challenging situations. Hydo specializes in helping her clients get laser focused so that they can be more productive at work and more relaxed and present at home. Her clients have received many benefits from working with a professional coach such as: enhanced decision making skills, greater interpersonal effectiveness, increased confidence, higher productivity, satisfaction with life and work, and movement in creating and attaining relevant goals. Hydo partners with her clients to help them find their life’s purpose. She is a frequent speaker, trainer and executive coach at USC, Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles, and Universal Music. She is consistently featured as an expert in A-list publications including Fast Company and the Chicago Tribune. As the author of #AskGretchen she gives readers real-world advice regarding relationships, business, careers, money, and love. Hydo has successfully launched several businesses, including Any Lengths Life Coaching and Chatterbox PR Ink. She is a very involved mother of two who has been married for over 15 years. For more information please contact [email protected] or read her reviews on Yelp. You can follow her on Twitter @AnyLegthsCoach.

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