A Memoir Through Letters

Author Claudia Sternbach has two sisters: twins Carol and Cheryl. Carol contracts cancer and dies. Her wife unloads on Claudia as her spouse is dying on the nearby bed. With her wife too ill to speak, she feels it’s the perfect time to tell Claudia how much she detests her. To make things worse, Cheryl agrees with her. Unhinged and hurt beyond belief, Claudia visits a psychologist. After a few sessions he gives her a homework assignment. “Tell me about the people who have added to your life.” He wants to know the people that helped shape her and guide her in unexpected ways. He says, “What would you say to them if you could?” In so doing, Sternbach writes to people she knows, total strangers, and her late sister. She begins with Goldie Hawn. 

In the letters we see a very sweet woman thrown under the bus by a jealous and vindictive sister-in-law. We learn Claudia was an airline stewardess, edited a literary journal for decades, and became an author. She has a wonderful and supportive husband, Michael, and two loving sisters until one marries. For reasons beyond her understanding, Claudia rubs Carol’s wife the wrong way and the woman bad mouths Claudia. What kind of person does such a thing? It’s interesting to note Sternbach never reveals her sister-in-law’s name, just referring to her as Carol’s wife. It must have been tempting, but Claudia never stoops to the woman’s level. She never utters a negative thought against her nemesis. 

Some of Claudia’s letters are written to Goldie Hawn, Leonard Cohen, Oprah, Bill Cosby, OJ Simpson, Tim Gunn, Stanley Tucci, and of course, Carol. Many of the people she never met, but they had some influence on her life. 

I especially liked her letter to “America’s Dad.” Claudia wants to thank Bill Cosby for making her mother laugh during a night club act years ago, before the man was accused of sexually assaulting many women. She reprimands him for his behavior: “You disgust me, you filthy pig.” Good job, Claudia. 

Dear Goldie Hawn, Dear Leonard Cohen is an excellent memoir where the author bares her soul providing an example readers can emulate to get to know themselves better.

About the Author

Claudia Sternbach is a writer who is equally at home on both coasts. She has one foot in Manhattan and the other in Northern California where her husband is planted as firmly as the redwoods. She is the author of the memoir, Now Breathe (1999, Whiteaker Press), has been published in several anthologies as well as in major newspapers, and was the Editor in Chief of Memoir (and), a literary journal. 

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